Montessori At Home: HOUSEHOLD CHORES

Montessori At Home is written by Crystal Herzog, mom to Iris (Sunflower) and Margot (Elementary). The child pictured above is mine, and per the usual is an example of What Not To Do. -Brooke

MONTESSORI AT HOME

Many of the Practical-life exercises your child is participating in at Sunflower will translate to tangible work at home as well.  Ah, chores.  Aside from your children’s chores making your household to-do list shorter (theoretically), chores provide benefits to children of all ages.  Giving a child a “real” job, like washing the lettuce or pulling weeds in the garden tends to settle needy toddlers (and older children too) into happy concentration.  Remember to use smaller-scale and age-appropriate tools, and your child’s chores will build more than her self-confidence.  Many so-called “chores” are tasks that hone the abilities young children are already working on: concentration, fine motor skills, and hand-eye coordination.  And children inevitably work on the more abstract skills as well, discernment ("if I pour too much, it will spill over"), logical cause-and-effect ("if I spill it, I'll need to wipe it up"), and patience, both theirs and your own.

Participating in the work of the household shows young children what it means to be part of a community, through lessons in cooperation and reciprocity.  Work nurtures their sense of self as able, independent, and esteemed members of the family.  There’s hope that as our kids grow up, working side by side with us, it affords quality time and easy intimacy.

You’re on board, how to make it work:

1.)  Start early.  Toddlers have an innate desire to be independent and helpful by mimicking their parents and caregivers, capitalize on it. 

2.)   Be specific and consistent.  If your child isn’t expected to regularly follow through, he may start putting chores off in hope someone else will do them for them for him.

3.)  Praise often.  Encourage the child while the chore is in progress. You want to build positive momentum, especially with young kids.

4.)  Don’t be picky and don’t insistent on perfection.  Show your child how to do the chore step by step, and then let your child do it; assist your child as needed, but don’t “re-do” their work.  Part of the reward of chores is the value of doing your own work; don’t undermine it by doing their work over.  Squint through the smeared glass, crunch through the carrots, smile, and thank your child kindly. 

5.)  Go easy with reminders and deadlines. You want the chore to get done without you micromanaging it. 

Below is a sample list of age appropriate chores.  In general, preschoolers can handle one or two simple one-step or two-step jobs; and older children can manage more.  Of course, kids mature at different rates and have different interests, so pick chores that will work for you and your children.  

18 months -2 year olds:

Anything you do where your child can mimic your work:

-wash and wipe

-wipe up their spills

-dust

-fold laundry (especially cloth napkins or match socks)

-pick up toys

-stack/sort books

-put child’s own dirty clothes in laundry bin/basket

-put trash in wastebasket

-pour child’s own beverage

-help change sibling’s diaper (get diaper, pull wipes, etc.)

-help make dinner

3-5 year olds (in addition to the list above):

-unload dishwasher

-set the table

-clear table

-rinse dishes

-dry dishes 

-sort silverware

-sort laundry by family member

-fold laundry (simple clothing items: shirts and pants)

-put away child’s own laundry clothes (hint:  teach child how to carry folded items so they don’t become unfolded)

-make child’s own bed

-bring in/check the mail

-pull weeds

-sweep floor with hand-held broom and dust pan

-put away groceries

-peel vegetables and cut fruits 

-wash floors

-put books on bookshelf correctly

-water garden/plants

-hang up child’s own coat and hat

-carry small groceries items

-pick out child’s own clothing and get dressed without assistance

-feed pet

-refill water dish for pet

6 years + (in addition to the lists above):

-vacuum

-make child’s own lunch

-change child’s own bed sheets

-rake leaves

-dig

-sweep with long-handled broom and dust pan

-wash table after meals 

-wipe down counters

-hand wash dishes

-load the dishwasher

-put dishes away

-emptying small trash cans/wastebaskets into trash bag

-wash windows

-wash car

-run dishwasher, washing machine, etc. (yes, if your child can run your iphone, they can run the household appliances, too)

You got to the bottom of the older child list, which leads to the question of money.   Should your child get an allowance for chores?  This is a personal choice; but keep in mind, chores are partly about responsibility and partly about learning household tasks.  Kids need to learn how to handle money, but perhaps not by doing chores they're supposed to do anyway.  It's especially important to not tie allowances to chores for younger kids, that's because a younger child isn’t motivated by money and may simply choose to not do them.  For older kids who already know how to be responsible, money can become a nice motivator for doing extra chores above and beyond their usual tasks.